Lady with a fan obsession

 I was recently looking for some art on the internet. I started looking at some Gustav Klimt, and saw "Lady with a Fan", something that started an eager search for painting of women with fans. Of course, this has been a widely used theme, with many excellent paintings by Picasso, Berthe Morisot and Renoir, but also by painters that were lesser known to me like Ayla Maher and Victor Ernesto Rivera. In any case, it has started a small obsession about drawing a lady with a fan.

I first draw some models with a pose and then look at pictures for the dress and fan. They are a combination of pencil, pastel and pen. I am not happy with any of them, but I am quietly enjoying this obsessive search in my mind for the perfect mysterious woman with a fan!

 

Face Masks

I hate face masks. Not just because of the exaggerated claims that it represents the main line of protection against the COVID virus (you can still get COVID if you were a mask!) or enormous the discomfort of breathing your own stale exhalations for hours (have you been on a 10-hour flight without taking your mask off?). No, the main reason to hate the masks is how it downgrades one of the most important things about human interaction: facial expressions.

I am surprised that this has not been more widely discussed amid all the concerns about COVID and social interactions. “Social distancing” and isolation are not the only repercussions that COVID is having on how we interact as humans.  Interacting with someone with a facemark is simply not the same as interacting with someone without.

Facial expressions are an inherent and important part of any conversation, and a partially covered face limits the conversation and opens up for misunderstandings (and this not counting the rather trivial fact that it is more difficult to hear what a person with a covered mouth is saying). Although the eyes are the most important part of the face, it does not take away that we, as humans, are unconsciously trained to interpret any small clues in a face: a widening or wrinkling nose; a half-smile or a cheek wrinkle; pursed lips or elvis lips. These and other micro-facial expressions become hidden when we interact, and contribute to limit trust.

You simply cannot get to know a person whose face is partially covered.

As society has slowly begun to open, our interactions are increasingly among mask-wearing people. In a shop one can understand it, although it adds another distance to the superficial interaction that could always benefit from a friendly expression. I reckon that common human politeness has suffered from the pandemic…

However, the situation is worse in social settings, and I have frankly little patience for having a conversation with a person whose face remains covered. It has happened to me in the office, where I have been at meetings where I take off my mask to the confused and sometimes slight discomfort of the others (I keep distance off course). Sometimes people also take off their masks, but at least as often they keep them on for a conversation that in my view is grossly distorted ensues. I am giving more away than I am receiving, and I can often hardly hide my annoyance, which is embarrassingly revealed by my uncovered face.

I don’t want to sound as if I am completely against masks: of course they limit the spread and provide comfort for many people. However, masks are not a panacea; they are at best a limited first line of defence against the COVID scourge and at worst a false sense of protection - a placebo against fear. Just like any other choice to protect against the virus wearing masks has consequences in how we interact as humans. Some people may judge them of limited value, but for me a human face represents an infinite world of details that has been another victim of this pandemic.

An Easter Story

 Galilee in the time of Jesus Christ… (rough translation from ancient scrolls)

“I am going to tell you about this wedding I went to, but please, serve me some wine first.”
Joseph of Naim loved wine, and Pontus served him some more of it. He had already had a few. This was surely to be a story of him being drunk! They would always have a good laugh with them, and he seemed in a good mood to tell this one; according to him, this story was different than any other.
And so Joseph started telling his story:

“I was invited for a wedding in Canaa. I really didn’t want to go! I know the father of the groom, and he is the cheapest man in all of Galilee! Not even for his children’s wedding will he serve any good food, he will water down the wine, which is already one of the cheapest... But… we are faraway relatives, and he had been at my sisters wedding. So I was obliged…"
"Nevertheless, the idea of going also gave me some amusement. I knew they would be thinking: 'oh no! Is Joseph of Naim coming!? Don’t you remember how he behaved at the last party!?'"
"Ha! I have always been the black sheep of the family, just because I like to have a good time!"

Joseph paused for a sip of wine and grinned: "In any case, I had no mayor expectations to this bore of a party, but thought I could take advantage and spend some time in Canaa, where I have some good drinking buddies."

"The wedding was nicely set up, as usual, and there were plenty of guests in the groom’s family’s house. We all sat down, and food was fine, although I couldn’t stop thinking about the cheap host. The wine was fine, but I immediately realized there wasn’t enough, and that we would run out."

"'Oh no!', I though, and tried to drink faster, so that I would be served again, and thus drink more than all others. I tell you my friends, that is years of drinking experience talking!"

"There were quite a few people at the party. I struck conversation with a friendly fellow called Andrew. Asking him what he did, he said he was a 'disciple'.
'A what!?'
'A disciple', he said. 'I follow my master Jesus of Nazareth and his teachings.'

"I just thought this was another nutcracker of those we are having so many of around here these days, but nevertheless I took a good liking to him, since he was keeping up quite up with me at drinking wine.
He told me that they were twelve disciples and I asked him what this Jesus did and so on, and he told me that he taught about love between all men.
I just thought, 'this is worse than I thought…'” 

"Anyway", Joseph continued as he asked for mote wine, "we kept chatting, making fun of the host and of the servants, while pouring wine down our throats. We were joined by another guy, whose name I hardly remember, but I think he was a cousin from Caesarea or something. A good drinker as well: he had brought his own goat-skin with half a firkin of excellent wine which he let us taste. Nevertheless, myself and my two drinking companions knew that the party was running out of wine, and even though it was early, I began to think that it would soon be time to leave the party and check out some of those rowdy local establishments in Canaa. You know how much I like travelling and seeing new places!"

"At one point one of those twelve disciples comes up to Andrew and tells him there is no more wine. He tells him that Maria (whom, I learned later is this Jesus of Nazareth’s mother. She is related to one of the newlyweds, and that is why they were invited) has told Jesus there is no wine, which apparently upset Jesus of Nazareth. He was now out in the back with the servants.
I just thought, 'sounds like a cool guy this Jesus fellow! I am upset as well!' Andrew got up with some difficulty, and asked me to come along to the back where Jesus was with the servants."

Joseph of Naim lit up as he described his meeting with Jesus of Nazareth: "I tell you one thing my friend: this Jesus of Nazareth is an incredible person! Strangely, you feel truly overwhelmed when you look at him. This was even so, as he was so upset. And I tell you, what I saw next I will never forget as long as I live":
"Jesus told the servants to take out some of the big stone pots. You know them; those pots with 4 firkins in each. There were six of the pots, and he ordered the servant to quickly fill them with water."
"I was a bit tipsy and was also helping out by giving orders to a couple of the servants: 'Yeah! And be quick with that water! Careful with the jar!', and so on." 

"You know me, I like making myself useful."

"Myself and my companion from Caesarea were giggling, while still sipping on the last of his wine from the goat skin, while Andrew was looking awfully serious. They filled up the pots with water, to the brim. I saw it! Nothing happened, and then Jesus told them to bring it out to the host.
I burst out in laughter. 'Ha! That cheap-ass will have himself a surprise with all that water!'
But Andrew looked at me, put a hand in one of the pots that were being carried out, and put it to my mouth. It was the most delicious wine I had ever tasted!
I tell you my friend, I stammered (and burped): 'but…. What…?' I had seen them put all the water in those pots!"

"We followed the servants out to the party, where the pots were placed in front of the host, and he was served some of the wine. He looked surprised, and asked why they were only bringing out the good wine now? Why they had not served the good wine first?"

"I am pretty sure that cheap-ass was just wondering who was paying for that delicious wine, and wishing he had had the opportunity to keep it to himself."

"The party really got started! I tell you my friend, I dug into that delicious wine with my friend from Caesarea, as if this was the last wine in the world. We loved it! And made from water! I still couldn’t believe it! I went up to Andrew, and asked him if his master his master was available for bachelor parties or other events, as I would be interested in hiring him."

"Andrew was a nice guy, and he smiled politely and said cheers in the delicious wine, while he told me that I should just remember what I had seen. I told him honestly 'I will never forget this! Well… I don’t promise I will remember the whole evening…' "

Joseph laughed heartily.

"You get it my friend? I thought it was the funniest thing I had ever said, but Andrew didn’t crack up. I guess when you are in the disciple business, you have to refrain from going too crazy, since Andrew kind of kept back on the wine (although he can probably get it every day)."

"As the night wore on everybody got more and more drunk, not least myself. You know how I like a party! My friend and I started a drinking conquest: down a quarter firkin, and then turn around yourself 10 times, and then down another half. Many were up for it, and we started off well. Nevertheless, at one point this bore of a guy came up to us and told us to keep it down and relax a bit. I just told him to mind his own business and pushed him away. I looked at him angrily, and I was pretty ready for a good fight, when my friend Andrew came by and dragged the guy away telling him, 'Judas Iskariot, don’t do this'.  Apparently, he was another of the disciples of Jesus of Nazareth, some of whom were obviously donkeys!
The drinking conquest continued just until the groom’s little brother threw up, and his grandmother dragged him away. Ha ha! The old lady looked with reproach at me!" 

“He has got to learn to drink sometime!', I shouted at her."

"After taking a huge piss during which I tried to write my name in the sand (I am so good at that you know, when it is in Latin), me and my friend from Caesarea then stood on the table arm in arm, and started to sing; well, firstly, I gave a speech." 

"You know my friend, that I have always been a great public speaker: I started by making a toast to the bride and groom: 'he will surely get to use the snake tonight!' and we all laughed (well, maybe mostly myself…).
We then sang one of the long songs: you know the one with 'more wine, more tits and less talk'!? Oh! I love that song! It didn’t catch on well though, and at one point the host asked us to step down from the table.
After my sixteenth refill, I thought we would have to thank the host, and shouted out: 'I think we need to cheer our greeeaaat host who has given us this night to never forget (most of it)! Cheers!'
People just cheered quietly, and then my friend from Caesarea shouted out, 'and Jesus of Nazareth!'"

"He was right! I shouted out 'A big cheer to Jesus of Nazareth and his disciples! May they continue giving their best to us all!'
My friend from Caesarea just shouted “heard!” and started cheering 'Jeeesus, Jeeeesus, Jeeesus!', and I joined him in cheering on the wine-maker from Nazareth.I don’t think this last part of my speech came out well with Jesus of Nazareth himself. But I really felt I needed to express my appreciation!"

"I wanted to thank Jesus of Nazareth personally, and even maybe ask if he had ever considered going into business. He was obviously an extremely talented man!"

"However, I was so overwhelmed by his presence, that I couldn’t get myself to go up and ask him. I don’t know. I have never been shy, but I tell you my friend.... There was something…. something amazing about that man. As if he was too large for all of us, even for me! I am sure it is not the last we have heard of him. Not only because of the wine, but I will always have his look burned into my mind."

"Now, my friend from Caesarea was not that shy: he was totally drunk when he filled up his goat-skin with water and went up to Jesus and said: 'can you make me a refill?',and as he burped lightly, Jesus looked at him seriously, just nodded, and signaled for him to go. At this point the party was ending, people were tiredly leaving, and I also decided that this was the time to leave. I said my goodbyes, among them to Andrew, the disciple: 'remember what I told you!', he said, and I could just repeat that I would never forget that day, and I had to promise to at least try to listen up on Jesus of Nazareth’s teachings, and all that..." 

"I got hold of my friend from Caesarea and asked him to come along into Canaa. Of course, he was ready, and we left cheerily down the road, singing songs praising Jesus and having good-ole burping contests.
After a while, we sat under a tree, and brought out the goat-skin which Jesus had just made into wine for my friend.
He took the first sip and spit it out immediately. 'Let me try', I said, and I also spit it. 'It’s pure vinegar!'
We looked worried at each other but then burst out laughing!" 

“This Jesus is truly great!!! He has a sense of humour as well!!!”

"We got up and continued into a drinking spree in the town, and merrily telling how we would have done the exact same thing ourselves. Jesus of Nazareth was an unforgettable fellow!”

Pontus and the others were impressed by this story as they ordered more wine. It was surely not as any other story Joseph of Naim had told before. Some of us had already heard about this Jesus of Nazareth. He was going around Galilee preaching. But this was surely the most impressive story they had heard!

Herostratic fame

In the outskirts of of Selcuk, in Turkey, on the way to the nearby ruins of the city of Ephesus, you can visit the meager leftovers ofthe ancient Temple of Artemis. 

Not much stands of what was one of the Seven Wonders of the ancient world: a lone columns reconstructed by the remains found at the site is a poor witness to its greatness. I visited the site in 2014. Besides the fascination of standing at a place with such a history (the Greek scholar from the Library of Alexandria, Callimachus said that the earliest temple at the site was started by the Amazons and was destroyed by a flood in the 7th century BC), the demise of the second Temple of Artemis remains a relevant story, as it is about the human narcissism that seems to have reached its peak nowadays!

The Second Temple of Artemis was constructed around the 6th Century BC, under a Cretan father-son architectural team: Chersiphron and Metagenes. The building was at the forefront of architecture and justly considered a wonder. It was the first temple built purely of marble and its proportions were enormous: 115 meters long, 46 meters wide, and with massive 13-meter high columns. 

The temple was destroyed by a fire on July 20th 356 BC, on the birth day of Alexander the Great. In an act of arson, a young man set fire to the temple wanting his name to be remembered forever! The young narcissist was captured, confessed, and was executed for his crime, and to punish him for all time, the Ephesians forbid anyone to ever pronounce his name under the penalty of death. 

The Ephesians reconstructed the temple. It stood for more than 600 years until it was seriously damaged by a Goth army in 256 AD, and then slowly decayed into oblivion with the ascent of Christianity in the 5th Century AD (only in 1869 the site was rediscovered by a British expedition). On the other hand, the young man was not condemned to oblivion: more than 2000 years later his name, Herostratus, still lives on. In fact, the term "Herostratic fame" refers to people's urge to be famous at any cost, a tendency that seems very alive today!

One year of the Pandemic

In February 2020 I was in Brussels. I saw friends I had been with in Liberia in 2015, after the Ebola pandemic that caused fear in the world and closed down three West African countries. We spoke about the new virus we were hearing about - Corona. The first cases had been diagnosed in Belgium, as the virus, which had started in China, seemed to be spreading around the world. We wondered if the effects would be just like Ebola, and I must admit that I thought, “no! Come on! Europe is well-prepared”.
One year later I can reflect on the fact that I was completely wrong about Europe’s (or anyone’s) level of preparedness.

I just made it back to El Salvador on February 28th 2020, via Madrid, which was already registering the first cases of what would be one of the worst outbreaks in the world. And I made it back just before the world started closing down. In El Salvador, lockdowns were imposed on March 18th, the same day I had a surgery (in an empty hospital, where they were preparing for what they almost described as an apocalyptic onslaught). I returned home the next day, and started what for me was a long and stressful lockdown.
I am not comparing myself to anyone; I know I am privileged, living in a large house, and with a job that provides me with all the amenities to make a lockdown bearable. And I am comfortable being alone, taking advantage of the time in terms of reading books, playing computer games, drawing, making  movies and distance learning.
Nevertheless, it was hard. I did go through long moments of lonely desperation; worrying like crazy about my family; missing the liberty of movement, of casually going out for a beer or just for a walks. Not planning any longer for my next adventure trip, but trying to be optimistic about when we could turn the corner and return to normality.

After nearly six months of lockdown, I managed to travel to an carefully opening Denmark. While airports in Houston, Frankfurt and Mexico, which I traveled through, were largely empty, there was a clear optimism that the worst part of the pandemic was over. In Denmark I saw family and friends; I even went out in Copenhagen one night where it was impossible to find a seat in a city that seemed happy and largely normal except for the masks.
How wrong we all were yet again.
Only six weeks later I managed to travel back to Denmark. Madrid and Frankfurt airports, normally so busy in the Christmas period, were completely closed as cases were spiking. Only a couple of days into my vacation, isolated in a summer-cabin, Denmark closed down again, throughout Christmas. I had to be tested before leaving my isolation and seeing my parents, and all instances of seeing friends were cancelled as the contagion spread as it had not done before. As for everyone, it was a strange Christmas, but I was as happy as I have ever been that I least got to spend it with my parents.

Returning to San Salvador, I passed through Madrid for a 14 hours layover. I took a walk downtown and saw a busy and crowded city in a country that continued to be ravaged by the virus. Maybe societies do only have themselves to blame for contagion. Maybe infection is the punishment for carelessness. 

I have been back nearly three months in San Salvador. I spend my time between the office and work. I go to the office a couple of days every week, wearing masks and keeping social distance (Why is it social distance? Should it not just be physical distance?).
I stay home, doing the same routines that I did during the worst part of the lockdown, and barely leaving the now-comfortable safety and solitude of my home. 

One year away, I have to admit that I have changed: I miss traveling, but I am a bit weary whenever I leave the security of my home. I am not able to relate normally with people, as I have nearly forgotten how to have a physical and casual conversation. I have not really touched any other human for more than a year; no hugs, kisses or even a handshake. And I have reflected much more about death, which seems ever looming in a world where every topic seems linked to our impending doom, of which the virus is only one symptom.

The vaccines are here, and that initially gave some renewed hope. However, as was foreseen already by The Economist, the advent of the vaccines would also mean the advent of vaccine-politics: who gets the vaccines, who pays, how are they distributed. The hope of the vaccines has thus been replaced by disillusioned pessimism about humanity’s capacity to even organise a fair and efficient vaccination programme. 

If we cannot even do this, how are we going to tackle more pressing problems?

So here we are, one year later, and while an end could be hoped for, it is impossible to feel a sense that all this will mean a better world, a better future, not to say the minimal return to a pre-COVID normality that soon will be nothing but nostalgic memories of a bygone time….

My Lego Christmas movies

 In 2011 I was traveling and a friend asked me to buy a lego for her son. I used to play a lot with lego when I was a kid, and as I was purchasing the lego for this kid, I decided to buy a lego for myself. Since then I have become one of these grownups who builds legos: big fan of the Lego Creator line, and during that first year I started playing around with Lego Stop-motion animations, something I would also have loved to play with as a child.

I am not an expert, and often try new things. But I greatly enjoy the many hours of building, patient filming, and then putting the film together. In 2011 I started with a Christmas movie, and ever since then I have tried to make a movie every year, so here is a review of all my Christmas movies since 2011:

• Merry Christmas from Erik (2011): Set to the Danish Christmas song "Let Love be Love", by Remee, it was one of my first attempts at a Lego-Christmas movie, and therefore, when I watch it today, I see many naive mistakes and a bit too long video. But it also has some good ideas I have since developed, and is generally a very cute video. Note that I was living in Venezuela when I made it, and I put a little celebration to Venezuela in there.
  
• Merry Christmas Baby (2012): A friend of mine gave a great compliment to this film: "it is very well cut"; and indeed, this is the first video where I started experimenting with the cutting of the scenes into the setting of the song "Merry Christmas Baby", by Chuck Berry. Despite some technical faults I was very happy about this video, and it remains one of my favourites.
• Christmas in Jail (2013): The first video I prepared in Liberia was also relatively simple, but I worked a lot in the parts to simulate driving, which came out well in an otherwise bit boring video where I did not try much new. It is set to the Youngsters' "Christmas in Jail" song, which may be depressing, but also with some humour that I wanted to have in the video.
  
• Santa Baby (2014): I remember this video for the year 2014, when I was partly evacuated September-October from Liberia due to Ebola, and then was only back for a few weeks. So amid a lot of work, I also had very little time to prepare a video, and it shows in a video where I used a lot of clips (used and discarded) from 2012, and made a few new shots that did not turn out well. It is set to a great version of "Santa Baby" by Macy Gray, but otherwise reminds me of that challenging year and is not very good.
• Merry Christmas (2015): I remember that this year I focused more on the story; I wanted to do something fun and unexpected, and I think it worked quite well. Set to Martina McBride's "Please Come Home for Christmas", it is about a Christmas zombie apocalypse, where the zombies celebrate Christmas as well. While I had learnt a lot by this time, there are still some mistakes that annoy me. This is perhaps the most commented video I ever made.
• Mama Kissing Santa Claus (2016): I had a great song I wanted to do something with; Amy Winehouse's cover of "I Saw Mama Kissing Santa Claus", and I prepared a video with vampires, where I also wanted to focus on the story. That said, it was a disappointing video, and I am still not happy with it whenever I see it. The story is stiff and lacks personality. It is a great song though!
• No Video (2017): In 2017 I moved from Liberia to El Salvador. It was at the end of the year, and my legos had not arrived by Christmas, so I made no movie. To some friends I sent an old test-video I had made in 2011, set to Elvis Presley's "Blue Christmas", but it is not very good in any way, except for a small comical thing at the end (I have since prepared a Christmas video that I keep in case I ever end up in a similar situation).
  
• Winter Wonderland (2018): I returned with new motivation in 2018, with a desire to do something really nice, with a story and try some new things. It worked well in a video set to Jason Mraz playing "Walking in a Winterland", I try to show an idyllic winter wonderland, only to end with all the snow having melted into a dry wasteland at the end. Climate Change?
• Blue Holiday (2019): This was and remains my most ambitious project, where I built the most and made most shots. It is set in a Star Wars universe, and starts with me having tried to recreate a scene in "The Empire Strikes Down", where Han Solo gets frozen into carbonite as Princess Leia tells him her love. The idea is that Princess Leia then sings Aretha Franklin's "Blue Christmas" as she misses Han Solo, flies the Millenium Falcon, performs at Mos Eisley Cantina, takes down the Empire at Hoth, and disturbs Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker as they fight. It was perhaps too ambitious and I spent a lot of time on the recreation and flying Millenium Falcon, but I am generally still happy about it (except the end).
• Merry Little Christmas (2020): I did not feel very motivated to make a video for 2020. But I ended up with a cute little thing, perhaps with a careful optimism after such a messed up year. While it is short, I have inserted many little things that were purely spontaneous ideas, as I this year did not make a manuscript but just built what I felt and shot what I felt, and only after decided on a song (Daniela Andrade's cover of "Merry Little Christmas").

I have generally used iMovies, but in a couple of instances CyberLink power Director, and experimented with Moviemaker and Filmora, although the two latter were not very good, and I think only the former allow me good flexibility, although each has some advantages and disadvantages. 

While I send my videos to friends as a little Christmas greeting (via private link) my videos (I have many more, not about Christmas) are not public and I have no interest in sharing. Like my drawings, writings or anything else, it is mediocre, and I do not do it for others; I do it exclusively for myself. 

Quarantine drawing

 I did many drawings during the quarantine; most were crap, some were worth showing (on https://www.flickr.com/photos/erikkristensen/), and just a few are some I would say I am happy about. One of them is the one here. Scary and sexy lady, I guess the inspiration came from a trip to Mexico in November last year (time flies!), and a whatever else lurks in the depth of my mind....